The ‘Sign on your Back’ is Attracting your Lover

What creates a Sign on your Back?

We all know what the term  ‘you must have a sign on your back’ means. It’s used to describe attracting the same toxic relationships over and over again. But it’s actually the invisible communication signals that attract some people and repel others. And we all have them.

So, in this post I’ll show you to tell,

  1. What your sign is and
  2. How you can change it

Emotional Distress Sign on your Back

You usually notice the sign on your back when something happens that doesn’t go your way. Such as a relationship breakup, the same types of partners keep appearing, people treating you like crap, whether it’s a partner, a boss, a child or a parent. And often the same scenario is repeated as well. Such as you being downcast and trodden on, and made to feel a fool or always wrong. It’s like you’re stuck in groundhog day and you just keep attracting bullies. This is an emotional distress sign on your back.

Even when you think you’re on top of this, you still keep attracting the same types. So why does this happen? Well, here’s the short answer. Inwardly, the belief that you are undeserving of love is active in your vibration.

What’s a Vibration?

So, let’s back up a bit. Your vibration is determined by your dominant mood and becomes your communication to the Universe. Your vibration is how you ask for what you want. You don’t ask with your words, you ask with your vibration.

And when you’ve been hurt lots of times before, you’re so aware of what you don’t want (like we spoke about in an earlier video), that you vibrate what you don’t want. It’s not a conscious thought, it’s just your inner pain and emotional distress trying to protect you the only way it knows how. So it sends up rockets that we call neon signs that attract more of what you’re vibrating. And these tend to be the things you don’t want.

A Sign on your Back can Attract Things you Love or Hate

It works on all things, those you love and the situations you hate, but it seems to be the ones that are the most painful situations that get the most notice.

So, the neon signs you walk around with are subconscious indicators of what your belief systems are. This means that you can be walking around with a neon sign on your back and not be aware of what it says until that person or those who respond to the sign come into your life and are standing directly in front of you.

Here’s how the Sign on your Back can Play out

For instance, Jamie has been in a toxic marriage for many years. She was bullied by her partner, not allowed to make her own decisions or have her own bank account. Her opinions were stifled or ridiculed and she became so frustrated with the situation that she eventually leaves the marriage. Friends and family have rallied around her with sympathy and protection, but she can’t wallow in self-pity as she needs to get a job.

So Jamie applies for a position, feels comfortable at the interview and starts next week. But that’s only the beginning of her anguish as she has a direct boss that doesn’t like her and even though it’s a female, she is back to being bullied. Not by her husband this time but by a supervisor.

So her sympathetic friends and family advise her to quit and get another job, but it’s all a similar story. Jamie eventually thinks she finds love, and even though he looks different, the circumstances are changed, and she is determined that this is a different relationship, it ends up being the same.

Which leads Jamie to believe that it’s difficult to find True Love as all the good ones are taken. She feels that it’s probably too late for her as she’d rather be lonely than find a bully.

Jamie Didn’t Know She had a Sign on her Back

What Jamie didn’t realize was that her neon sign was active in all her relationships, whether they’re friends, colleagues, supervisors, train conductors or lovers. Jamie was feeling so victimized by her marriage that she walked around unknowingly with the sign “Pick me, I’m a victim” or “Pick me, I’ve been bullied”.

So the only people that would see those neon signs and respond to them were the ones that would either sympathize or bully her.

And often, the only time you are aware of these signs is when something turns up in your life that you don’t like. You’ve attracted it through the neon sign on your back, flashing brightly for all to see.

This is one of the 5 Biggest Mistakes we see people makes when looking for True Love. And if you’re not aware of the sign on your back, you’re heading for relationship disaster.

1. How do you tell what your neon sign is?

That’s easy. It’s reflected back to you by the relationships in your life right now. How do you feel about them. Are they annoying, angry, controlling, easy-going, victims, smothering, optimistic, or loving? Because these relationships are responding to your neon sign. It’s not what these people are like that tells you what your sign is. It’s how you feel about your relationship with them. This indicator is for you not them. So how you feel about the relationship, is your sign.

2. What sign would you like to emanate?

When you’re aware of what the sign is, then you can choose differently. What would you prefer? Imagine your relationships 6 months, 2 years or even 5 years down the track. How do you see yourself in these relationships? Use your imagination to create something you do want. A relationship where you feel empowered and happy.

3. Put Changes in Place

The changes aren’t about others and avoiding people you don’t like. They aren’t about sifting and sorting through lists of potential partners or getting back in the dating scene. They’re the inner work. It’s much easier to change yourself than others.

So the changes would be:

a. change your self-talk

b. focus on where you’re heading

c. look for things that feel a little better and a little better

We all have neon signs that flash and attract people who can see them. The aim of this video is to help you to change the neon sign your flashing so that you can be attracting people you do like. Opportunities you love and relationships that are uplifting. And this is how you do it.

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How to Avoid these 5 Painful Mistakes when Looking for Love


These are the 5 Biggest Mistakes we see most people make. You really need to know these if you're looking for your One True Love.

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About Gayle Maree

Gayle believes that the story of everyone's relationship can be improved. Most people are not as happy and fulfilled as they’d like to be. She writes, thinks, and speaks about shedding limiting beliefs so that women can feel the freedom to shine.

Overcoming decades of limiting beliefs and anxiety was a catalyst for becoming a Spiritual Counselor over 20 years ago. 

People are attracted to Gayle for the high energy, intuitive insights and deep wisdom; and for the powerful transformation, they gain through her programs.

Are you ready to close the door on the past and move forward with confidence to begin to love again?

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